Disenchantment and a Wooden Spoon [Private]

She just had that feeling she cant explain or say, no matter how many times she dug around her brain to find the necessary words to utter it out. Every attempt Nai made to do so ended up in failure when the word she picked didn’t convey what she wanted to say. But it started in the early morning when she first woke up by the sound of her internal alarm. That itself alone was odd, for you see Kurenai wasn’t and never would be a morning person. She tried, hundreds of times but in the end her distain for getting up beyond the sane hour of Ten often won out. Except… for today when her internal alarm woke her an hour before her phone alarm could.

Foreboding. That’s a word. She felt the cold grip of unease for reasons she couldn’t fathom. Something in her heart told her something was going to happen… a premonition? Or an early warning but there was one thing the girl was being certain of was how her unease steadily worsen every time she turned to look at her roommate. She just knew… deep down something was going to happen.
But did Kurenai act upon the warning her instincts where giving her? Without possible proof… Kurenai merely chalked her discomfort off as her nerves being flayed from Kiran telling her about his lessons during talent training class.

Haha… hear that? She’s trying to warily chuck off the growing chill travelling up her spine as the topic brought back her own issues with her… ‘curse’. To the rest of the academy she’s nothing but a book smart ordinary person who wasn’t part of the selective group to receive a strange power. In a way Nai preferred it that way, now if only it was a reality she would dearly like to have. But that wasn’t meant to be. Like how the times she tried to reach out but ultimately due to her lack of experience with people her age any attempts she made ended up in her making a fool out of herself.
But who was she kidding herself? The girl lamented in defeat. A sad smile uncharacteristically made its way out of her carefully controlled façade before it soon faded as the girl shook off her own doubts. She paused her hand on the door knob. Waiting for a few minutes to recollect her composure before facing her roommate. He…really didn’t need to be exposed to her problems. Her heart tightened. Like a hand slowly squeezing the life out of the soft muscle the girl soon gave up another sigh before she called out. “Fang-kun! I’m back!” She called out her normal greeted. It became somewhat of a ritual for her whenever she returned to their dorms.

So imagine…her surprise when her greeting failed to attract and answer from her roommate. This normally shouldn’t come as a surprise. She’s used to having her greeting unanswered even before Fang came to her life but… it felt strange, especially since when he started talking she could always expect some form of response from him. Her throat clenched, threatening to tighten around the ping pong ball sized air pocket currently lodged up her throat in a gulp. “Fang?...” She called again. Raising an eyebrow she slowly headed for the bedroom. Its rare for Fang to leave the room. He almost never did unless its Kiran dragging him out. “Fang-kun are you here?...” The oblivious child called as she opened the door---

Instantly her hand froze. It froze as her disbelieving eyes settled the red stain marring her carpet. And the cause of the stain…was the pale figure of her bleeding roommate. She gulped, the beat of her heart ran from normal to marathon in less than three seconds as her breaths heaved into a shaky stutter. That…couldn’t be! A shaky hand immediately pinched her arm hard enough that her nail broke straight into skin causing the blood to bubble out of the small cut. But that was enough to snap the girl to move. Instantly she was on his side, blood soaked to her hands as she shakily tried to shake the still boy. “F-Fang-kun? If this is a joke, this isn’t funny!” The girl shaky voice spoke in the middle of shaking the lifeless teen. Nothing… his once warm skin now cold to the touch. That’s when the tears finally released itself as she just…sobbed. She should have listened, the warnings were there… but still she ignored it. And now what was she going to tell Kiran? That she let his bestfriend die in her care? Oh that’s…going to go over so well…

In spite the gentle flames flickering over the corpse of her roommate Nai still wasn’t comforted by the reminder that the man she was mourning over could never die. Death simply never touched the eternal birds unless there was some spectacular ability to yank souls out without the chance of rebirthing… but would that even kill them? Morbid thoughts right there for someone who keeps her own appearance as a benign soul.

But this was the subject of death, no real harm in talking about the inevitable. As a human, her time is already as limited as it goes. Compared to the rest of the species human lifespans were nothing but a mere glance to them. A mere flicker of a candle. Once the final wax burns way and the strand of string turns to char its life is just as gone. Like a candle light a human’s life can end anytime without warning.

Now imagine… how a phoenix views the life of a squishy human? A human who can easily die from natural or unnatural causes. She didn’t need to elaborate, she was no phoenix either way but she can outright guess what they would say. For all their innovation in building their society they were still a slave to the cycle.

Fat tears cascaded down the girl’s porcelain tint cheeks the redness apparent in her purple orbs as she paused her sobs when she felt the gentle heat rise from the downed phoenix’s body and just like a repeat of the incident in the courtyard his body dwindled down into ash then into a onyx coloured egg that sat innocently on the bed he just bled at. Nai… stared.
She stared just as the tears still dripped. She looked shock alright, shocked! That the girl looked as though it froze her straight on the spot. For a bit it did…and then. Her mind snapped out of it. The gears swirled within her mindscape, turning from the fresh ‘oil’ lubricating its gears until…silence.

The chilling silence no one expected from the young girl who… merely sat there without moving until the final second where Fang’s egg started twitching. Cracks appeared on the marbled surface but still she didn’t move until the small child emerged from his shell in a fit of displeasure. “How dare…?” There was a sharpness in her tone, and before Fang knew it, she smacked him straight on the head. “OF ALL…. The idiotic things you could have done, this topped everything. Fang.” The girl wasted no time in eyeing the boy with a look of displeasure and... disappointment? She was mad yes, mad and disappointed that Fang would resort to outright suicide.

The… The!

And all that was left was Nai who was too shell shocked to stop the boy from running away. Gods she messed up didn’t she? Nai’s internal scolding reached new heights when she began utilizing a few choice curses alongside her normal leers towards her own mistakes. How… HOW could she be so stupid?! But in her defence, she hadn’t expected the teen to be suicidal. His actions alone caught the girl off guard without a chance to develop a way to distance herself from it.

The results is what you see. Her losing a portion of her mask in retaliation to what he did. Immortality aside, committing suicide infront of a race that could actually DIE from certain things while forgoing the fact the person committing it cant die no matter how much he wished it to be true.

She… hadn’t noticed. How stupid. Absolutely stupid. And she calls herself an expert in perception. This incident came as a blow to her own damn pride, but that’s another story. Fang mattered now, pissed off or not Kurenai recognized her mistake when her bonk echoed and the betrayed look on Fang’s face hit her like a ton of reinforced bricks. The full weight of her actions sunk in… gods… she wasn’t dealing with an adult. Age aside, she wasn’t dealing with an adult. How many times did she need to remind herself? The girl continued to chastise herself. Shakily pulling herself upwards. The child’s gaze never let the window Fang leaped out from while his words still echoed… Sumimasen…. He was sorry…

What a way to bolster the five ton weight of guilt already hanging on her shoulders. Nai felt as numb as she moved to right her room. From placing towels on the blood puddle to clean it from… changing the sheets on Fang’s bed. She moved as though she was on autopilot. Her mind not fully committing to her job as it was busy replaying the final message Fang left her.

Guilt, now it was guilt plaguing her once her tempered simmered down. How she hated the feeling. It was a way for her conscience to say to go after the boy. But… at this point in time he could be anyway. Still that didn’t stop the small voice in her head from pointing out she could at least try. It took several more attempts by her conscience before Nai broke her silence by grabbing a thick blanket from her bed before rushing out to go and search for Fang. In the forest, he made his way to the forest, the girl who barely remembered to bring her own jacket dashed from her dorm room. Never mind how she wasn’t still a hundred percent. Forget her! She’ll be fine… Nai internally reasoned. Rushing past the halls she knew by memory and toward the few students passing along at that time. She made her way out of her dorm building and now was straight out in the cold as she made a dash for the forest. “Dammit dammit… Fang you big idiot…” She worriedly mumbled.

Stupid, stupid! The girl berated herself even now while she searched for her wayward charge. Not only as she responsible for the boy but the promise she gave to Kiran came back without warning. She promised she’d help him. Not scare the living daylights out of a triggered phoenix who probably suffered far greater atrocities than she could wrap her head around on. And what does he do? She slaps him in the heat of her ire towards his action.

It was stress brought by his actions catching her by surprise. She had no warning, albeit there might have been tell-tale signs through his demeanour she merely chucked off as ‘normal’ Fang mood. It wasn’t now wasn’t it? She was too blind to notice, too oblivious to raise the silent red flag to keep an eye out for him and look where that landed the both of them… The child sighed in a mix of her own frustration and worry. Worried eyes glanced from each side of wintry landscape. Ice and frost covered the branches with the white fluff of snow. Chilling winds blew from the east, ruffling the delicate strands of her snow coloured hair. In the midst of all the snow and ice the image of a young albino didn’t look at all out of place trudging along in the snow. In fact with her wearing a kimono one of the old legends of her homeland came to mind in describing the girl. The so called snow ghost who wonders the alps luring men to their doom.

Yuki-onna was it? She looked like a snow maiden wandering her domain if it wasn’t for the fact she too was suffering the slight chill. But still Kurenai pressed on her personal mission to track her wayward roommate. “Fang-kun!!” The worried teen called out to the phoenix only for her calls to be met with silence and the faint shrill of the passing wind.

WHERE WAS HE!? Was the internal question raging through her head, just as she was about to call in Kiran a noise snapped her attention. A crash to be precise of a large object or SOMEONE falling from untold heights into the ground. She winced, mentally feeling sorry for the poor soul who had to suffer from that fall but still it didn’t stop her from looking. Low and behold, it was the same man she was trying to hunt down. Only… he…wasn’t a little tyke anymore. A blush as red as a tomato flared through her cheeks. Warning them up despite the bitter chill surrounding them. Naked as the day he was born so to speak…was a way to describe Fang’s lack of clothes. She wanted to gaped, to disregard her remaining dignity and just…stare but she snapped herself out of her stupor to walk closer to the boy. The worry in her eyes never left as she wrapped the blanket she had with her around his chilled form. “Baka Fang your such a baka… I came because I was worried about you.” She scolded, flickering his nose gently before without a single warning she hugged him.

“I’m sorry I snapped at you…That wasn’t my intention but I was just scared you actually died…. Please don’t do it again.” She whispered softly.

There he again, speaking nonsense both knew by now Nai would never do. She already invested her time in helping him. She wasn’t going to back out now because of a decision he made out of his own reluctance to live in a world so far from what he was used to. Was that his reason? No… there’s bound to be something deeper. Fang might be a quiet soul but she doubted he was that shallow as to end it all because of the work involve in integrating into modern society. If Kiran managed then she had no doubts Fang would be just fine.

But she was forgetting something else entirely, Kiran wasn’t exactly trapped in a rebirthing cycle for god knows how long. She might be a sheltered child but that didn’t prevent her from knowing the truth in how brutal Arka can be towards their prisoners. She had… family in Arka, both whom serve whichever military force in that damned city. Family is still family… she might dislike their birthplace but she was raised to value family. She still valued them just not where they came from. A soft flick touched the boy’s frozen forehead as Nai’s exasperated purple orbs stared at him. “I’m not giving up on you.” She stated bluntly. “I promised I’ll help and I’m not about to give up just because of a few bad decisions.” She then smiled, showing a gentler side to her scolding.

“So please…don’t give up on yourself…” She whispered gently, reaching her soft hand up to wipe the frosted tears on his cheeks it was only then did she noticed the extent of the frost he’s suffering. Her eyes widened in panic. “Actually lets get back now.” The worried girl panicked, now only made worse when he started coughing out ash. She recalled Kiran suffering from it before, phoenix monthlies was it? And she also recalled how lethargic it made the normally bouncy phoenix. Without another word she tugged at his hand, biding the boy to follow her back. She wasn’t taking no for an answer it seems when it came to his please of letting him go to suffer the elements.

If she could she’d rather prevent Fang from catching the start of a cold. But that’s wishful thinking when he’s already been exposed to the chill. The only thing she can do is prevent further damage.

So much for resting. The notion flew right out the same window her red headed roommate fled in. Jumping in alongside the boy as he made his escape from his own actions. The girl sometimes had to wonder why was she doing all this hard work for someone? It wasn’t a thought she allowed to show on her face but a moment’s musing she still let wander around her mind. The answer was plain as the question itself. She promised, Nai gave her word. It would be consider dishonourable if she backed out now.

Not only was her pride on the line but she genuinely cared for him as a friend should. Fang’s a gentle soul. He showed it numerous times, from him helping her around while her arm was healing to him fixing the damage he caused. Whether guilt ridden or not he still had enough compassion to feel guilt. She wasn’t about to let him wither away just because of a rotten past he has yet to learn how to handle. Tugging at his hand to keep pace with her Nai spirited him through the halls. Lucky for them it was a time where they were barely any people roaming around and in the hallways they took to reach their shared room. Lucky for one reason alone, most were in the cafeteria eating their meals.

Lunch or dinner? Nai couldn’t exactly recall she hardly bothered heading to the cafeteria herself as she found the place too crowded for her taste. A sigh of relief left her pale lips once they were safety inside her room. Safe from people seeing her dragging around a naked teenager. Too many questions she’d rather not answer you see. “Fang---” She turned only to pause once she saw his body violently shivering from the cold. This…this is what she warned him about running around getting expose to the damn elements! But Nai didn’t have the heart in her to tell him that, instead the girl’s purple orbs widened in a spur of panic. “Exposure… this is why I always tell you to wear a jacket…” She half scolded, the other half was too busy helping her mind dig out any information on what to do.

He was cold… and yet, she reluctantly ignored protocol and crossed into his space. Reaching out her hand to touch his forehead she felt the budding fever through the skin of her hand. Fever already? He was official ill… Helping her roommate over to the couch, she mulled over a few solutions until it landed on the subject he wasn’t too fond off. “Fang-kun…? Would you be fine taking a bath to warm up?” She asked. Dreading the subject herself as that would mean personally seeing through that her water fearing roommate actually stays in the tub.

He needed to warm up. And perhaps get all those scrapes he got from falling from god knows where cleaned for good measure. Nai hated forcing the teen to do something he obviously hated. But if it was for his own good then she had to steel her own heart for his sake. A bath might sound harmless to many but to Fang it might as well be his kryptonite. Nai internally felt for the shivering boy as he shed the blanket keeping his decency intact.

And as demanded by her sense of decency Nai quickly averted her gaze once the blanket slid from Fang’s lithe frame before it had a chance to peer below the collection of packed ab—dear kami! She shoved the thought before it had a chance to finish the sentence. Nai’s cheeks flushed slightly at the thought. She nearly saw below the belt didn’t she? She hoped she didn’t, if she did… then she might have to find brain bleach somewhere. Another gulp, and Nai reluctantly opened her eyes to find… Fang in the water, still shivering from the combination of the chill and his own phobia surfacing out as he curled tightly at the end of the tub.

Her heart really goes out to him. It really does but sacrifices must be made. She sighed softly, tentatively approaching him before she handed the boy a bottle of her tea scented shower gel. “Its made from tea leaves you might like the scent…” She said, trying to distract him before she placed both her hands on his shoulders to massage the tensed muscle. It wasn’t much, but anything to distract the boy from his thoughts she’ll take.

“Fang-kun?” She searched for any subject she could use to distract the both them. Partly distracting her from the fact shes in a bathroom with a naked guy and for him for his fear of water. “Is there a potion to preserve food?” Random. Completely random but that’s where her thought decided to go.